I miss......

Well, a few months ago I moved in with my dad to try to see if things would be easier. And they are not; still can't find a job, I miss my boyfriend, my family, and what friends I have. Nothing has changed for me at all, but everything down with my mom seems better. My sister got car, my brother has his licences, and they both have a few new tattoos. What the happened in my life to fuck me over?

I really believe, somedays, that god never meant me to live pasted the age of 14(I don't really want to get into what that means). The day I decided to live, everything went down hill for me. I mean, there were a few good things that came out of it. I'm with a great guy, my parents got to see me graduate, and I got my first nephew. But what else is there for me? I feel stuck in a hole with no way out and everyday it just keep getting deeper.

I miss everyone, and just wish things had been different in this life for me. People always tell me to think positive and things will get better, I just have to work at it. While, I have been working at it for so long now, I don't know what else I can do. I just wish I had someone to talk to here, face to face. I'm so sick of talking to my dad, brother and all of his friends. I NEED A GIRL DAY OR SOMETHING!!!!!! I want out of this funk or whatever it is. I wish my boyfriend would help with getting a job and his licences. I want to start my life now. And I know that I need to help too. Where do I start, where should I do, what do I do? I have been all over this stupid town and nothing.